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Wednesday, 23 October 2013

Gratitude: Stop. Listen and Experience.

This film explains so much about how we should be grateful every day for the gift of life. We really do not know how long life will last so we have to live each day as our last. Be grateful. Be happy. Be loving. Just be yourself and enjoy your life.

What are you grateful for today? I'd love to hear your comments below. 

Monday, 21 October 2013

Six Secrets for a Long Healthy Relationship

We live in a time when people change relationships more often than they change hairstyles. Some people would call them disposable. Easy come. Easy go. But, what happens, when you think you've found the one. You know, the one they wrote epic poems about long ago. The one that makes every other relationship pale by comparison -- at least as far as your relationship experiences are concerned. How do you hold on to this special relationship while so many other couples are unable to make it work?

The key word here is work. You have to work at making relationships last. Fortunately for you, these six secrets for relationship success don't always feel like the hard work they are.

1) Communicate. You have to communicate effectively with each other. That doesn’t simply mean you have to talk to each other. You have to also understand each other and be on the same page about many things in your relationships and in the lives you build together.

2) Connect. The physical connection between couples is vital to relationship longevity. It goes beyond what takes place in the bedroom however. You really do need the connection of human touch to help solidify your bond. Cuddle together on the couch, hold hands in the theater, and hug each other as often as possible. The more you touch, in a genuine and affectionate manner, generally speaking, the happier you are together.

3) Find common ground. Every relationship needs a little common ground. These are the areas where the two of you have shared convictions. Sometimes these convictions are based on morals or religion. Other times they're related to causes or politics. Whatever your shared convictions may be, it's a wise plan to cultivate that common ground and grow together.

4) Shared interests. This is a little different than common ground. Your interests don't have to be on the same scale. However, if you both love the ocean you might find that buying a sailboat, for instance, is a great way to feed the love of sailing the open seas for one while feeding the love of water and sunshine for the other. You both love the ocean and sailing gives you an opportunity to enjoy the thing you both love together.

5) Companionship. You must spend time together if your relationship is going to work. Otherwise there really isn't a relationship to cultivate. Time is critical. Finding positive ways to spend your time together, even in troubling times, is a great way to build a stronger relationship together -- especially if you're both committed to the cause of making your relationship last.

6) Time apart. While it's important to spend time as a couple in order to cultivate and grow the relationship, it's also important to enjoy a little time outside of your partner's company. You both need friends on the side for blowing off steam, wise counsel, and a little break from the intensity of the relationship.

These six secrets may not look like all that much on a piece of paper, but over the years, they will all make a huge difference in the strength and resilience of your relationship together. Keep them in mind at all times for best results.

Sunday, 28 July 2013

Meditation Rocks For Happiness.

Finally, a new study has been conducted that will (I hope) encouraged people to stay in the moment. And that's because you will be more happy there. Meditation is a great way to achieve this. The past has gone, the future is not here yet and all you have is today.

Saturday, 11 May 2013

Positive Affirmations Can Help You Become Less Defensive

Have you ever been having a chat with someone and they say something that triggers a very defensive remark from you? I'm sure we have all done this at some time. Some do it more than others. Then that friend looks puzzled. These are often called triggers to negative affirmations that we have developed over time and we do this often as a survival mechanism. Affirmations are words or thoughts that create a belief system deep within our subconscious that we feel are crucial to our survival. It's known as a conditioned response. That belief system is not always a true representation of the world around us. It develops from: positive and negative life experiences; parents; teachers; peers; the TV and the media. Prejudice is probably the most extreme negative response example.

So how does a negative response to a positive thought such as "I am a good person" affect us in life? The first thing we need to do is understand what those bad thoughts are such as "I'm a bad person" and why they became triggers for us. These affirmations can work in our best interest or they can work against us. Imagine being in an interview and the interviewer asks how did you handle a difficult situation. "Well, I walked away and sent someone else to deal with it as I have a serious issue with confrontation. It's because my mum and dad argued all the time. It scared me." "Oh so you would not be able to do the job if faced with a difficult situation." Now I'm not saying that is exactly what you might say in an interview. It could develop an uncomfortable feeling within you and your reply of dealing with a difficult situation may not sound so congruent. You will want to respond with confidence and a sincere reply. We do not always voice the automatic response from our subconscious. However, it's there knocking on the door changing the way you say something, how you come across to others and it could show in your body language.

How do you use affirmations and what can you expect to happen? Well, I really enjoy searching for affirmations, motivational and inspirational quotes on the internet in the morning to post on any Social Media sites. Its' good to see it in black and white, which makes me feel pretty good. Then other people like my affirmations or quotes and that just doubles the happy sensation for me. This is having a positive response to positive affirmations, which has been accepted by my subconscious. The positive response to "I'm a good person" is feeling I am a good person. I feel good.

So what happens when you have a negative response to a positive affirmation? A negative response to "I'm a good person" will not feel very nice. Your subconscious may be fighting back and letting you know it feels threatened. Over the years of working with people with addiction, I've noticed how they are full of feelings of wanting to really change and even after detoxification, they go back to their addictive behaviour. Then they are miserable again. The happiness is fleeting. Even though it's bad to misuse alcohol and the person knows this; the subconscious believes that this is important to survival. It's dysfunctional thinking. Many people will challenge this and make the changes in their lives that they want no matter what negative feelings they are receiving from within. In the case of addiction I recommend medical assistance. However, dealing with the mental challenges is an excellent way to fight back against this faulty thinking.

I know it takes a lot of time and energy to re-examine your belief system. That's how affirmations can help. Think of it in simple terms. If you find a positive affirmation that, when said out loud, makes you feel good, your subconscious is accepting it as true. When your positive affirmation triggers a negative response, then you know that this may need to be challenged.

How can you challenge these negative responses? Just follow these 3 tips and turn those responses in to positive ones. This is the time to change and challenge any defensive responses you are experiencing. Life could be a lot more fun and your social relationships will benefit enormously from it. So here they are:
  1. Find a positive quotation or affirmation that looks good to you, and then try it out. "I look fabulous." Replace this with something you would like to change about yourself. Say it every morning and just note how you feel when you say it. If it's a great feeling then you are accepting you look fabulous. If it's bad feeling, then challenge it.

  2. Challenging negative responses to positive affirmations. It's simple: just keep doing it until the feeling becomes a positive response. It will happen eventually. Repetition is a very powerful tool for most things including changing your mindset. Things take time and I know we want an instant result but changing belief systems takes time. It'll all be worth it.

  3. If you are feeling strong negative emotions. I recommend that you seek professional help, which can help you to decide how to begin to heal within.
I'm feeling very excited for you that you are embarking on a journey that will help you to begin to respond in a positive way and not have your day ruined by those unpleasant feelings. A positive affirmation for you: "I believe in myself." Say it out loud and see how wonderful you will feel in time.

My name is Amanda Hemers and it is my passion to share inspirational stories, emails, videos, e-books and personal development courses. I have been inspiring and coaching many people from all walks of life to be empowered for over 10 years. It is my goal to inspire and support people to achieve their dreams. Over 20 years I have been working through many personal development programmes finding the best sources and mentors in the business. I want to share all this information with you and support you on your journey to success and happiness. If you would like to know more then you can visit my website at and I'll be giving you 4 free ebooks full of tips and actions for you to start your journey.

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Monday, 6 May 2013

Heartbroken Sayings Can Comfort And Inspire You

Sometimes our own words do not suffice. Finding the right words to truly express how we feel can be difficult, especially if you have been unlucky in love.  Using heartbroken sayings can be comforting and help you not feel as alone as you learn how others have coped with loss and have expressed how they feel.

Quotes about heartbreak are numerous and can be quite eloquent or even funny. Here are some notable heartbroken sayings and hopefully they will help you:

- “Love is never lost. If not reciprocated, it will flow back and soften and purify the heart.” – Washington Irving. Coming from the man who wrote the Legend of Sleepy Hollow, this is a surprising sentiment, but it offers a positive spin on unrequited love.

- “If you love someone, set them free. If they come back they're yours; if they don't they never were.” – Richard Bach. This is a famous love quote that offers some comfort if you have loved and lost. Setting them free can also be interpreted also as giving them some space rather than your relationship breaking up completely.

- “What is the opposite of two?  A lonely me, a lonely you.” - Richard Wilbur. This quote makes a simple but eloquent statement. This makes the point that there were two of you in the relationship, so each of you has suffered the heartbreak of breaking up. This is easy to forget if you only focus on how you are feeling.

- “Sadness flies away on the wings of time.” - Jean de La Fontaine. What you are feeling right now will not last forever even though it may not feel like that now. Make sure to allow yourself time to grieve the loss of a relationship. Moving on too quickly can be more detrimental in the long run.

- “Nothing takes the taste out of peanut butter quite like unrequited love.” - Charlie Brown. Leave it to Charles Schultz to describe a feeling so simply. With such a simple statement, we can all understand the sentiment behind the quote easily.

- “Relationships are like glass.  Sometimes it's better to leave them broken than try to hurt yourself putting it back together.” - Author Unknown. While our first instinct is to do everything we can to mend the relationship, sometimes it is better that it ends as that may cause more heartbreak.

- “I don't know why they call it heartbreak.  It feels like every other part of my body is broken too.” - Missy Altijd. Love lost can affect you in many ways, including feeling pain throughout your body along with the emotional pain. What we project mentally can manifest physically. If you decide to project positivity, it can help ease your pain.

- “Count the garden by the flowers, never by the leaves that fall.  Count your life with smiles and not the tears that roll.” - Author Unknown. This is a reminder to count our blessings and while we may be hurting from a break up, we should still value the relationship we lost.

Saturday, 6 April 2013

Can I Get My Ex To Love Me Again - Yes I Can

You just can't get your ex out of your head even though you are single or even with someone new. You can't help thinking "How can I get my ex to love me again..." You may try to get the thought out of your mind especially as you believe that you will never get your ex back. Well, guess what, you can get your ex back. People have done it before and many times, and you can do it too. 

Very often you will not understand why your ex left you and there are many different reasons for it. And that includes the reasons why men do it or women do it. Our brains are wired up differently, which can make it confusing for us. Some break-ups are pretty clear but not all of them. 

So before we push ahead at making a plan for you to get your ex back, let’s look at the reasons they might not be around anymore. 

Why do men leave a relationship? It's really easy really. When a man is not getting what he needs, he will leave. They need you to respect and admire them. Either they left for this reason or they found this somewhere else with someone else. The most common reason men leave their loved one is "No matter what I did, I couldn't make her happy!” 

Why do women leave a relationship? Women like to be appreciated and that's why they often leave. They feel unappreciated or sometimes, bored. Many women who are unhappy in relationships say, "He doesn't appreciate a thing I do!"

Well, sometimes the reason why someone leaves you is because you cheated on them. You do need to think about why you cheated on them in the first place. Was it because your ex didn't pay you enough attention and you didn't feel really appreciated? It's not an excuse to cheat on someone but it's a question that needs to be asked. Another classic reason your ex may have left you is because you just were not around enough. Yet again, ask yourself why were you not around? 

It's good after a break up to objectively look at your relationship. Look at all the negative and positive things that contributed to your relationship when it was working and when it broke up. It's important during this time that you take good care of yourself, eat healthy and exercise. Surely, you'll want to look good for when you get your ex back. 

Now that you've been honest with yourself and been able to see objectively why your relationship broke up, you could consider contacting your ex. Ask them out for a coffee in a really casual, nice way. Be cool. If they say yes, do it. Keep the conversation really light and fun. Don't mention your relationship and try to keep the date short. At the end of the date, if your ex doesn't suggest meeting again, don't suggest it. You may be thinking can I get my ex back? Yes, you can! It depends on whether you still want them back. 

Regardless of whether the date goes well or just okay or awful, you will know what to do next. If it went awful then look at the situation and decide whether to try again later or maybe you will decide to just move on. 

Ideally though if the date went well, you'll be able to see how the answer to "Can I Get My Ex to Love Me Again? is "Yes I can!" 

Thank you for reading. I'd love to know your thoughts and experiences on this article. If your interested in becoming part of the Your Right To Happiness Community receiving emails about becoming happier just sign in here: